Disconnection and Opening

Dear Friends, Next Monday, December 8th, we will hold our contemplative worship service. On Monday December 15th will hold our last practice of presence session for 2014. We will resume our practice of presence on Monday January 5th. Please be sure to check your email before each session to see if  we need to cancel because of poor weather.

On Monday we focused on Matthew 5:3.

Those who are lowly of spirit live in a state of blessedness, for out of their very Being the Reign of Heaven arrives. ( Traditional translation: Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the Kingdom of Heaven)

Our session focused on what it means to lowly of spirit. There are differing meanings and they all have their place. Lowly of spirit means a state of humility, that of the beggar begging. It can also mean a state in which ego is absent, or the state of hitting bottom or the state of disconnection.

We spent some time exploring the place of disconnection. The place of a rock bottom emptiness, dullness, despair, hopelessness. A place we all run from. This is the place where ego developed and arose over the course of our development. And it was necessary. It is the root of the sense of separation; of the "gap" (we used this expression earlier this fall); of the existential sense of meaninglessness, helplessness, powerlessness. If we allow ourselves to surrender, be with, hold, allow, be present with this sense of nothingness, an alchemy can happen and does happen. What arises is a sense of an exhale, a relaxation and sense of inner spaciousness and mysteriously the sense of connection returns. We are back from the sense of exile into a world where life seems possible once again. This alchemy happens all the time. We often feel better and then we jump back into the maelstrom of life! If we stay in this subtle opening patiently and expectantly, more treasures will arise. Out of the mystery of this spaciousness come the flavors and faces of presence. Sometime we feel love, or clarity, or joy, or peace, or strength.... This is what the turning means, what metanoia means. We turn towards the disconnection-- the lowly state of spirit-- instead of running away, distracting ourselves, and going to sleep one way or another.

This is difficult and tender work. So don't let the superego attack you. Don't loose heart or courage. This is a practice, not a one shot deal! We deepen drop by drop-- sometimes with splurges-- but mostly drop by drop. Each time we taste the opening our trust can grow.

Exercises:

Tell me a way you avoid inner emptying.

Tell me a way you experience the inner state of emptying or inner poverty.

Explore your relationship to inner emptying. What happens if you allow yourself to feel this emptiness in your body, in your belly.

Hope to see next Monday.

In peace, Alison